Confessions Of A Male Model
Photographed by David Urbanke
Styled by Jordan Boothe
Written by Dio Anthony
DIO ANTHONY: General question to start. When I was growing up in Philly, so many of my friends wanted to be models, but none of them became models. A lot of local people from Philly don't travel to New York city and it's just an hour and a half away. I'd always tell them––go to New York! Go to New York! Go to a casting call! Something! It never happened for them, even those that really wanted it. How’d you end up modeling? Was it something that always interested you?
LIAM KELLY: To be blunt? Not at all. It's funny because I grew up in Philly. I went to high school in Philly and it was one of those things where maybe around 15, 16, I’d meet people and they would say things along the lines of ..You should be a model.I always figured it was just a subtle way of flirting or complimenting. But I was never like, Oh yeah, that's a career opportunity. It was very much a–– thanks for telling me I don't look bad today kinda thing. I appreciated it. I had friends that were really interested in a lot of visual design, a lot of fashion students and stuff like that. Around that same time I definitely gained some respect for it because when I was younger, I was the kid that wore Gap jeans and Khol’s sweatshirts. I didn't really know anything further than that. It always amazed me that people would pay high amounts of money for high fashion. I began viewing it differently. Seeing it more of a creative output–– as opposed to just a marketing and financial thing. Eventually when I got into modeling, I said to myself–– I'm going to be the best possible model I can be. I had a lot of love for seeing designer’s work in person. That was the coolest thing for me. I got to see these creative geniuses go to work. Everybody's got their own style or method and that's part of the fun.
ANTHONY: How do you feel about the classic trajectory of model to actor?
KELLY: It makes me think about Mark Wahlberg or Channing Tatum. I love the idea of this jacked dude with an attitude becoming the face of Calvin Klein underwear, and then gets cast as a porn star in a movie. I think that’s brilliant. As far as my overall view on the model to acting pipeline, I think it makes a lot of sense and I'm not necessarily critical of it. I think there are examples of dudes that might get roles for no real reason other than how they look. But so be it, I think the opposite can also be true. It makes a lot of sense for casting directors to look for models. Who am I to say that a guy can't learn how to act?
ANTHONY: Of course. A lot of people say modeling is acting in a lot of ways.
KELLY: I've also heard that actors can be terrible at photo shoots.
ANTHONY: That can certainly be the case too. It’s interesting you say that because a lot of models, good ones at least, know how to command themselves in front of a still camera. You can be a very good actor and command a scene really well. But it’s different when you’re being yourself. Whereas in acting you have a script. You’re feeding off of your scene partner’s energy. At a single model shoot, you’re just up there on stage per se. So to me, in a way, it’s like––if you’re not acting, then what’re you doing up there?
KELLY: Definitely. It can start to feel stagnant. I’ve been in those situations where you’re shooting by yourself––and not to make excuses, but your team that day may not seem super enthusiastic. The best shoots are definitely the ones where as a model, I'm trying something and everybody's responding to it. Even if they’re just like, oh that’s interesting. What if we do this? Or that? I think it’s really good when you have a certain amount of dialogue. Especially between a model and a photographer. And I guess in a lot of ways that can exist between actors and directors, I'd have to imagine. Like, I know you want this, but what if this lines’ a little bit different? The same way as a model, maybe it can be worth a shot if you suggest a pose. What if I slightly alter this? Maybe it’s just a facial gesture. Sometimes that can be great. It can be a hell yeah, I didn’t even think about that kind of moment. That’s always fun.
ANTHONY: A lot of people learn how to act. Some people are just naturally good at just stepping into a moment. Some people are classically and formally trained at ivy league colleges for acting. But there isn’t a go-to path for modeling school. You’re just learning on your own. So it’s very interesting when models make names for themselves. When they’re recognized. It feels like a self-made thing that is different than acting, where you are taught the craft..
KELLY: Yeah, it’s weird. That just made me think of something. I really love meeting guys early on. I have an agency in Belgium, and my agent there, he's really good at finding these guys, predominantly Dutch, German, French guys off the street. A lot of times they're 18 and not sure what they're getting themselves into. You know what I mean? But you see their personalities, and sometimes it’s like, man, this is a really good kid. I wonder what they'll do. Then you see a year’s progression, two years.. I don't want to use a term like coming out of their shell–– but it’s a little true. You're surprised by what they can do and you get the sense that they're surprised in themselves. I was always the kid in class that talked a bunch, I was never shy. I was super goofy. So the idea of standing in front of people and being vocal wasn't as intimidating for me as maybe it is for some people. At the same time I thought––I don't know what the hell am I doing here. My first real shoot was for Calvin Klein. As the day progressed, and this happens a lot on shoots… It’s almost like you’re starting from square one on a day-to-day basis. You have to get a feel for what the energy is as well as the direction. Then you just go for it. You begin to do things. I can look at a picture of myself sometimes, some of my favorite pictures and I'm like, man, I barely see myself in that. My first shot that ever got released was for a Parisian brand; Ludovic de Saint Sernin and I was wearing a leather break -part thong. I was standing in a pond in France and I'll never forget coming back to Philly and everybody's like, oh, you went off to do a modeling and stuff? And that was the first picture they see. Of course some of my friends rag me for it. A lot of my other friends were like, don't listen to them, it’s beautiful. I didn't really care either way what the perception was, but I can understand why people do. My feeling on it was, man, this is really interesting. I'm looking at this picture and I barely remember doing that, posing the way I had–– because it just happened in the moment.
ANTHONY: That experience is so interesting to me. Does that happen a lot? Not recognizing yourself in photographs?
KELLY: Definitely, and I feel pride in that. I like to see pictures and really appreciate the whole team effort. Where the photographer really nailed the lighting on a shot. The styling was so on point and the art direction was perfect. When it all comes together, it's a really satisfying thing. That's why I find myself posting editorials more than anything on my Instagram. I don’t post a lot of the jobs that I do. Not because I don't like the brands or the pictures, but it's because I really enjoy those shots where things are a little different, right?
ANTHONY: Is there an editorial that stands out as memorable to you?
KELLY: I think one of my most memorable experiences on set was a shoot for Numero Berlin. It was a witch themed shoot. Four female models and myself, and they literally had me tied into a harness. So it looked like I was floating above them and they were doing some ritualistic exercise. It hurt. It was painful. I'm not trying to put them on the spot, but I had to try and stay straight the entire time. By the time I got out of it, my ribs were basically purple. They were so sorry. But I was like, nah, this is really cool. I'm with you guys on this.
ANTHONY: Do you think there's something that you wish someone would have told you about the fashion industry? Something that you know now that would have been nice to know before?
KELLY: I’ll give the answer that I hope doesn't sound pretentious. But in a weird way, I'm kind of happy that I didn't know much going into it. If I had to be honest, if there's one thing I wish people had told me more about, was the taxes and the financial aspect of it all.
ANTHONY: I don’t think there’s much talk about that aspect..
KELLY: Yeah, I mean, I worked for Budweiser before I modeled. I was getting paystubs and showing up in a warehouse at 5:30 in the morning with an hourly check-in. I went from that to having an agent and getting paid from jobs, sometimes even a year later. Learning about getting an accountant and finding things to write off. That was a huge change for me. Luckily I'm not a big spender. When it comes to the industry itself, I'm happy that I went into it a little blindly. I like to joke with people and tell them what I thought the designer names were pronounced like. When I first started modeling I didn’t know any of that.
ANTHONY: That's perfect. I recently read about a similar situation of a model mispronouncing designer names on set. Having an admiration for the brand, but not knowing they were mispronouncing to begin with. It’s hard to prepare for that.
KELLY: That's what I mean by I'm happy I didn't know. I was pleasantly surprised by how much it not only mattered, but in its own way, it turned out to be a good thing. I know when I went off to Europe, I was very intimidated just by the names of these cities, like Milan, Paris, London. Now I know them very well and I'm very comfortable there. But, coming from Philadelphia, I was like, Oh geez. I don't know what the culture is going to be like and I thought I was going to have to really adjust, you know, maybe even my personality. I was really happy with how the kid from Philadelphia shtick actually kind of worked. They loved it. It was different. I actually try to tell people that a lot too, because a lot of people reach out to me about getting into modeling.
ANTHONY: What’s your usual advice?
KELLY: I'm not really very helpful, cause I got pretty lucky, but I will say to them––don’t try to put on airs. These brands, you're talking to people that have worked with Kate Moss and Naomi Campbell. There's nothing you're going to do that’s going to impress them. Not your knowledge of clothes or how you dress. But if that's your thing and you genuinely have a passion for that, that’s different.
ANTHONY: It feels to me like they’re looking for authenticity.
KELLY: Some of these guys come in and they're wearing a huge outfit for a casting and I'm like, Oh man…You're not going to interview. I mean you are, but it's not a matter of dressing up. Not getting a Brook’s brother’s suit.
ANTHONY: Has being a model put you in touch with a part of yourself that you may have not been tapped into before?
KELLY: Oh yeah. Weirdly, my emotions. That can be different person to person. You're putting yourself in these ominous characters sometimes, where you're trying to express something. Even if it's something that you're not feeling in the moment, and maybe afterwards it stays with you. Not to be super dramatic, but it can be a form of physical therapy. A big one is also being in touch with your feminine side. I feel like most guys would say that—especially in high fashion modeling.
ANTHONY: I love that because that is such a big part of the model. You have to be able to just tune into those things. This happened at our shoot, with the look on the shag carpet. It wasn’t something I expected us to do––but you stepped right into that moment. Because these photographs, to me, they’re like mini movies.
KELLY: Absolutely. And they can be night and day from one shot to the next. I think it's awesome. I'm the first one to jokingly rag on modeling. But in truth, when it really comes together and it clicks, that can be really great
At Fashion Week parties, you see these people that are such individuals and just really fucking own it. I love going into a party and there's somebody that might be all up in drag, but then there's another guy that's doing a cowboy thing. I get off on that. I think it’s so sick. Their personal preferences, their tastes, their attitude, whatever it is, is only furthering them. It's not hindering them. I think that's such a unique aspect of modeling and the fashion industry in general. In a lot of industries, unfortunately you have to conform a little bit, and in fashion the opposite is true.
ANTHONY: Tell me about your first Job in the fashion industry?
KELLY: This is a good story. I got scouted on Instagram, by a photographer who put me in contact. I went up to New York to meet my mother agent JD, cause’ he was over from Belgium because it was February and he had some guys doing shows. I met with him, he was really nice and asked to go on a walk.
I remember afterwards he gave me the contract. He said, you don't have to sign it right now. No pressure. Take it home. Think on it. I was like, all right––do I go home now? I had been there maybe six or seven hours. He said, well you can and if you'd like––Calvin Klein would like to see you tomorrow. You have to imagine I went out there, only planning to meet this agency, that I know nothing about. He goes on to tell me that RAF Simmons is doing the a show and they’re casting for it with Olivier Rizzo styling.This was February of 2018. Meanwhile I’m texting my friends at home like you’re not going to believe this. The next day I went to the casting. What happens next is so funny looking back on it, now that I’ve done a bunch of Fashion Weeks and know what the mannerisms are. I walked in and because of who I was and where I was coming from after waiting for an hour; I walked right up to the table and shook everyone’s hands. I’m Liam, nice to meet you. I literally shook hands with everybody. I did the walk and it was all nice. I ended up doing their fittings for months afterwards. I would go and fit the prototypes for the 205W93NYC stuff. Which was really nice. I always think back to that. Castings can be very fast paced, you would never see that now. I just thought that's what you did. I knew who RAF Simmons was, but I wasn’t familiar enough with all the names to understand the gravity of the situation. To me I was just meeting my boss. Who knows, maybe I wouldn’t have worked with them as much had I not looked like such a weirdo.
ANTHONY: For sure. First impressions, you know what I mean? Those things count. Is there a reason why you haven’t made the move to New York, permanently, VS, living in Philly and commuting to the city for work? You had a different essence on set and so the experience was different. The groomer mentioned that it may be because you’re not a New York boy.
KELLY: Simply put—a constant motivation is the rent difference, honestly. But on top of that, if I can really get to the bottom of it, I just feel more comfortable with myself in a more relaxed atmosphere. I would agree with the sentiment of maybe I’m not a New York boy. However, that doesn’t mean I’m uncomfortable in New York. I’ve taken the Chinatown bus up to New York by myself since I was like 13, to go skate and hang out with people, crashing with a friend for a week at a time. I’m very comfortable there. But I find that when I’m there, I can’t really maintain a nice pace. I don't want to say I’m a party animal, but it just feels like every time I go to New York and I’m going out, I'm such a social person that I end up talking to a group of people and next thing you know, I'm on a roof in Hell's Kitchen and it's like 11:00 AM. You know what I mean? And it's great. Those are good experiences to have. I think I’d spend a lot of money if I lived there and wouldn’t be able to reel myself in too much. Philly's just better at keeping me grounded.
ANTHONY: Totally. Philly is so removed from that world of New York, even being so close to it. I tell people all the time––It’s a big city, but it doesn’t feel like a big city. There are a lot of small town qualities.
KELLY: I’m very willing. I'm a big believer in the idea of that there's no half measures. If you're going to do something, you got to do all the way. If I ever got to a point where I felt like it wasn't sustainable for me to stay in Philadelphia and work, then I would make that decision. I wouldn't fight it that much. Right now, it's easy for me to get up at 5:30 in the morning and get on the train and make it to a job.
ANTHONY: I know a lot of people say that modeling is a short career––but I actually think the opposite.I feel like if you're a good model and you have that thing. For some people it may be their face, for others it’s their attitude. But I think one could have a very long career. You’re riding it out now. But have you given thought to, say being that 45 year old model that’s still killing it?
KELLY: I think a lot of it boils down to what you want to do with your life. But as far as continuing on that career path, I probably would. it is a field that gives you enough free time and a financial freedom that you can pursue other things while it's happening. Let's say I was modeling, but one thing started to slowly take over more of my time––so be it. But, I’m definitely along for the ride. I think a lot of it has to do with keeping an open mind as well. I have to give a lot of credit to my agent. After the Calvin thing, I met with Urban Outfitters, and thought it went really well. I hadn’t heard much and so I reached out to him, and he just laid it out for me. He said, I feel like it's too early for that. Which I didn’t understand. But there are a lot of politics involved in modeling. The truth is, you could do Macy's your first week, but you might not do XYZ. Ever. But if you do it the other way around, it's very plausible. He just didn't want me to do––call it what you want to call it, but commercial, mainstream, whatever. Not until I had set myself up. He had to establish a certain kind of reputation. But it's not really fair. I'm not questioning the morality of it. I'm sure there are guys that start out doing Levi's and they probably have the capacity to be a very, very good high fashion model. But they just might not get that chance because they've established themselves differently. Lots of Politics in this modeling world, but I think it exists everywhere. I like looking at it from a sociology lens. You can make observations on it, but it is what it is. I'm just happy that I worked it the right way.
I did a Macy’s job recently and of course my mom was thrilled that she’d actually be able to see a picture of me in Philadelphia for once. I can tell people at home I’m doing jobs for Fendi and Dries Van Noten or any awesome brands that I have a lot of love for now. But they weren't showing up you know, our local Nordstrom..
ANTHONY: Growing up in Philadelphia, and having lived elsewhere, I’d come home and get into conversations with people where they’d ask me what I did for work. I’d tell them I was a writer, or did this or that..and it was always like..oh wait? It was always a conversation that led to the next, because it’s not the norm. Have you experienced something similar being in such an elusive industry?
KELLY: Totally. It was especially crazy a couple years ago. Particularly pre-COVID, when I was going to parties at my old Hangouts in north Philly around Temple University, which is where most of my friends attend school. Even the ones that didn't go to school lived in the area because it was the cheapest neighborhood to move out and live in. Most of them were in bands or they were artists, whether they were studying art or pursuing on their own. After being away for months, I’d go to these parties and get paraded with questions. It was exciting and fun, and it was nice to talk to people. But then after awhile began avoiding it to be honest with you. There'd be times where somebody would ask me, well, what do you do? And I'd say, I work in the fashion industry. I wouldn't even say modeling. They'd assume I'm working at Urban probably because their headquarters are in Philadelphia. Otherwise I love talking about it, especially with my friends, but sometimes it can get a little redundant, even thought it’s fun.
ANTHONY: This may be silly but, do you look up to other models?
KELLY: Oh my gosh. Absolutely.I think it goes back to what I was saying about being really excited about knowing somebody personally and then seeing what their body of work can be like. I really love when it's really apparent that guys are stepping out of themselves and completely devoting themselves to what they're doing. I think that's cool in any field, but in modeling it's awesome. I don’t know if you’re familiar with Alpha Dia. He’s phenomenal, and it’s because of his work ethic. There’s a certain X factor—he’s a powerhouse. This guy will do like 35 shoes a season, and that’s exhausting. But you’ll see him running around, jumping into a car to go to another show and his attitude is where it needs to be.
ANTHONY: Like I said earlier. This way of life, it’s self-imposed and self-made. I think the respect is bigger because it's not like he’s running around with a whole team. Prepping and making sure everything is right. It’s just him.
KELLY: In the same thread, this guy––Leon Dame. He got really big after after this really intense walk where he was strutting really hard with his hands on his hips. I think it went viral. I know him pretty well now. He’s so friendly and a really approachable guy. He gets on that runway, and if you give him the reign to do what he wants to do, he's gonna go for it. As somebody who never grew up thinking about modeling or really any aspect of it, I see that and I’m like hell yeah! I got pumped up watching that video of him, cause it’s hard. I think that's one of the hardest things for guys to do. I always tell people––yo models for the most part are all pretty good looking. It's not so much a matter of who looks better. But who's willing to bring that energy to what they're doing––even if they're not like that in real life. They’re committed to what they're bringing to the table. I think you can always look up to that.
ANTHONY: I think that’s so inspiring. I feel like we’re doing a 20/20 episode on modeling. I love this. My last question––I should’ve asked you this earlier, but what have you learned about growing up in a city like Philly? This is something I've been thinking about myself. Having lived in so many other places, but returning to visit often. I think Philadelphia is a humbling place. A long time ago I read that Pennsylvania was called the middle-class state. I loved that. It's very America. I think it breeds a different type of person.
KELLY: When I mention Philadelphia, whether it's on jobs or otherwise, the first adjective that comes into my head is blue collar, especially in Roxborough where I grew up. The main economic drivers are roofers, plumbers and electricians. My dad was a carpenter. My stepdad is a union foreman at a warehouse. My mom's a Beer sales person.
ANTHONY: Very blue collar.
KELLY: Yeah and I think that can seem so disconnected from something like modeling.But at the end of the day, if you look at it just in terms of work ethic or, the willingness to go for it, there's definitely parallels that you can draw. Growing up in a place like Roxborough or generally in Philadelphia, what I learned is just not to take things for granted. I see what my friends are doing and what my girlfriend does and it's good to see where everybody's taking their life. It’s such a dense question––I’m trying to answer it correctly.
ANTHONY: I think you have.
KELLY: I wouldn't trade it for the world that’s for sure. The high school I went to was called central high school, with like 2,500 students. It was actually the nation's most diverse high school in 2016. It was ranked that, but that’s kind of like a fake award. If you look every year, the top 10 is basically identical. It's usually high schools in New York. My school tried to make the demographic as even as possible, and I understand that a lot schools can't or aren’t able to do that. I thought it was such an amazing thing to actually do for everybody that went there. In return you get this amazing plethora of financial, ethnic and cultural backgrounds. Even though Philly is very much a bubble, it’s the kind of place that people are born, live and die in. I met a bunch of different types of people, even before I got to really see the world. It almost felt like I had a little bit of a footing already because of it. I was in Shanghai and I remembered a friend of mine from high school. This girl Mindy, who was also from Shanghai. She told me the best place to get dumplings. Who would have thought that my high school in Philadelphia would have the best Shanghai dumpling connection? You know what I mean?
ANTHONY: You definitely get some little bit of a course of the world because of the people around you.
KELLY: Right, and I don't think people see Philadelphia that way. They see New York as that place.
Additional Team Credits:
Grooming by Melissa DeZarate